Moderated Religious #RogueRiddle 1119 #RogueRiddle

gary hallock

ROGUE RIDDLE #1119 - Launched Tuesday, April 19, 2022 @9:15pm central

Send all guesses, grunts, groans & gripes directly to <gary@...>

Since the two previous Rogues have played on religious themes and terms, I believe I’ll go for the holy trinity this week and take a run at punning on the names of some actual religions. So, rather than just sit here and Easter at a blank screen and merely Passover this opportunity, I thought I’d give you the Ramadan on Rogue #1119.

The late comedian George Carlin was first to give a name to a religious concept called “Frisbeetarianism, the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.” Taking off from his well-worn example, I have compiled a short list other lesser-known religions, sects, cults and/or belief systems, some of which I hope you will recognize and identify for me.

First player to furnish me with any reasonable assemble of guesses may claim the honor of hosting their own Rogue next week. If not, then you’ll have to suffer through yet another round of Leerless Feeding.

Send all guesses, grunts, groans & gripes directly to <gary@...>

0. (Simple sample)
This sect considers themselves to be “God’s frozen people.” They thrive on a liquid diet of citrus squeezings. They are known as ACIDIC JUICE.

Garfield the cat has apparently overcome his famous disdain for a certain day of the week. In fact he’s now joined a cult that actually favors and celebrates that particular day. They would probably be pleased if the calendar could contain even MORMONS.

This religion was founded by bone surgeons in a hurry. They are known as RUSHIN’ ORTHO DOCS.

This cult does not allow the wearing of sandals, slippers, sneakers or any type of shoe that might reveal any portion of the foot or ankle. They are strictly BOOTISTS.

There’s a religious sect in Jamaica that has very peculiar food tastes. They seem to dread lox but they do enjoy vast quantities of Italian noodles. They are known as PASTAFARIANS.

This charismatic cult sounds like it could be an offshoot of the sect identified in #4, but they seem mostly obsessed with a particular type of noodle that’s popular only near the sea shores. They’re PENNE COASTALS.

These folks claim to not believe in any higher power but they are pretty sure it was not God who invented teflon frying pans. They are the EGG NO STICKS.

This group contends that women should not wear suits of armor because only MENNONITES.

While this sect deplores the practice of applying cosmetics to sentient creatures, they’re apparently okay with using colonies of ground dwelling insects for the same experimental purposes. They are PROTESTANTS.

The son-in-law of our recent American president is suffering from male pattern baldness. This is somewhat ironic, for he comes from a hirsute family. They are known as the HAIRY KUSHNERS.

Cattle ranchers routinely place large blocks of salt out in their fields so their cows can get necessary minerals. Lesser known is the fact that some national park rangers do this as well. This is mostly for the benefit of migratory feral felines who also require occasional mineral supplements. A salt block used for this purpose is known as a ROAMIN’ CAT LICK.

Send all guesses, grunts, groans & gripes directly to <gary@...>

Gary (Immodest Moderator) Hallock, Leerless Feeder