Is that where you matriculated, “The School of Hard Rocks?”

In T - 24 hours (or thereabouts) the launch of RR977 will commence. You’ve been given fare, and propeller warning ...

Chris G

As a side note, I sent the riddle to a Sports Book in Vegas, and they’ve established the following odds of solving:

Lars - 9/4
Kirk - 3/1
Gary - 7/2
Cyn - 9/2
David - 5/1
Doug - 6/1
“Field” - 10/1

Feel free to engage in a few wagers, amongst yourselves...

See below:

I feel like the little girl I once was whom nobody wanted to play with.



NOBODY has sent ONE SINGLE ENTRY to the Rogue!



It's not Pun-Off weekend.

It's not SuperBowl Sunday.

Were you all watching the golf game yesterday?

Even so…it's today now.



WHERE IS EVERYBODY?



Are you boycotting me?

Shunning me?

Do I have Body Odor?

Play with me!



Rogue Riddle # 976



Remember DON'T hit Reply.



Send all guesses, curses, and whatnot to:



Cynthia@cynthiamacgregor.com



Here, now, the Riddle:



RR 976 – Punch lines



And now for something completely different!



What follows are punch lines. What’s missing is the riddles that lead to these punch line answers. YOU supply the riddles for as many as you can.



Judging is admittedly subjective. My tastes rule as I decide who has the most clever questions. Get your entries in by Tuesday morning, when I’ll decide/announce the winner. Ready? Set. VanGogh!



1 – Ulysses S. Grunt

2 – car-icature

3 – marriage vowels

4 – hurrycane

5 – measuremint

6 – mattresscide

7 – orangyoutan

8 – camembear

9 - below knee

10 – hippopartamus

11 – abracadaver





Make it a splendiferous day!



Cynthia ("Cyn") MacGregor

Freelance writer/editor

www.cynthiamacgregor.com



Pass a smile along







Make it a splendiferous day!



Cynthia ("Cyn") MacGregor

Freelance writer/editor

www.cynthiamacgregor.com



Pass a smile along



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Five people played this week and three of them solved everything on Saturday, so I'm revealing the answers now.

Cyn will host Riddle 976 next weekend.  She solved right after Chris did, but Chris opted out since he hosted last week.

1

The crows' charity benefit draws

Many donors and lots of applause.

            I asked, "Why give money?"

            She said to me, "Honey,

People know it is for a good caws."

 

2

Baby crow has a face that is dour

'Cause the food mommy fed tasted sour.

            It's a veggie that's white

            But just doesn't taste right.

Baby crow doesn't like caw-liflower.

 

3

Crow committed some major faux pas.

What he did was against many laws.

            His fowl talk was a shame.

            A policeman then came

To arrest him on probable caws.

 

4

Many birds in the trees have been talking

About what crows are doing; it's shocking.

            To waterproof a nest,

            Crows say that what the best

Kind of sealant to use is caw-king.

 

5

If you don't like a pun, I presume

When you read these five lines, you will fume.

            This last Halloween,

            A crow had been seen;

He was wearing a graveyard caws-tomb.

 

6

When the crow died and took its last breath,

Siblings wondered just why.  Was it meth?

            The autopsy said

            The reason's he's dead

Methamphetamine use: caws of death.

 

7

Crow once sat on a phone wire be-caws

He intended to talk to macaws

            That were friends far away

            On the edge of LA.

He was making some long distance caws.

 

8

In a flock of some crows, there is one

That is constantly making a pun.

            He's an outcast, you see.

            When they fly to a tree,

Other crows will proceed with caw-shun.

 

9

I know of a crow that's a robber

Whose victims he always will clobber.

            He is gruesome and grim,

            So what folks say 'bout him:

Crow's actions are really ma-caw-bre.

 

10

If crows uttered harsh cries, you'd expect

Other birds would most likely detect

            There was something amiss,

            And such actions as this

Would result in some caws and effect.

 

11

There's a crow that I know, a Malaysian

That I met on a special occasion.

            He's not black, but instead

            From his tail to his head

Is light coloring; he's a caw-casian.

 

12

At a meeting of crows in Caracas,

They became rather rowdy and raucous.

            This political group

            Then decided to swoop

Down to trees and conducted a caw-cus.

Each of the 12 limericks below contains one or more missing words.  Supply the missing words.  The person with the most correct answers wins.

 

Crows at Christmastime don't have the blahs,

And the reason is simply be-caws

            While they sleep Christmas eve,

            They are sure they'll receive

Lots of gifts from the famed _______   _______.

 

Answer:  Santa Caws

 

**************************************************

*****  Send your answers to kirkmiller@...    *****

*****  Do NOT click "Reply" because that will send  *****

*****  your reply to everybody on this mailing list.  ******

**************************************************

 

1

The crows' charity benefit draws

Many donors and lots of applause.

            I asked, "Why give money?"

            She said to me, "Honey,

People know it is for a _______   _______."

 

2

Baby crow has a face that is dour

'Cause the food mommy fed tasted sour.

            It's a veggie that's white

            But just doesn't taste right.

Baby crow doesn't like ­_______-_______.

 

3

Crow committed some major faux pas.

What he did was against many laws.

            His fowl talk was a shame.

            A policeman then came

To arrest him on _______   _______.

 

4

Many birds in the trees have been talking

About what crows are doing; it's shocking.

            To waterproof a nest,

            Crows say that what the best

Kind of sealant to use is _______-_______.

 

5

If you don't like a pun, I presume

When you read these five lines, you will fume.

            This last Halloween,

            A crow had been seen;

He was wearing a graveyard _______-_______.

 

6

When the crow died and took its last breath,

Siblings wondered just why.  Was it meth?

            The autopsy said

            The reason's he's dead

Methamphetamine use: _______   _______   _______.

 

7

Crow once sat on a phone wire be-caws

He intended to talk to macaws

            That were friends far away

            On the edge of LA.

He was making some _______   _______   _______.

 

8

In a flock of some crows, there is one

That is constantly making a pun.

            He's an outcast, you see.

            When they fly to a tree,

Other crows will proceed with _______-_______.

 

9

I know of a crow that's a robber

Whose victims he always will clobber.

            He is gruesome and grim,

            So what folks say 'bout him:

Crow's actions are really _______-_______-_______.

 

10

If crows uttered harsh cries, you'd expect

Other birds would most likely detect

            There was something amiss,

            And such actions as this

Would result in some _______   _______   _______.

 

11

There's a crow that I know, a Malaysian

That I met on a special occasion.

            He's not black, but instead

            From his tail to his head

Is light coloring; he's a _______-_______.

 

12

At a meeting of crows in Caracas,

They became rather rowdy and raucous.

            This political group

            Then decided to swoop

Down to trees and conducted a _______-_______.

 

**************************************************

*****  Send your answers to kirkmiller@...    *****

*****  Do NOT click "Reply" because that will send  *****

*****  your reply to everybody on this mailing list.  ******

**************************************************

Second clue:

Church charity (event) is the key clue in the first haiku ...

Dear punsters:

So far I’ve heard from two players. Neither seem to know where this ship is heading; in fairness, and to encourage more to take a stab, I’ll offer the first set of clues. Look carefully at the limericks. They are acrostic. Let’s see if this helps to trigger a guess ...

Chris,

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><> Rouge Riddle #974 <><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>

 <><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><> Limericks and Haikus <><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>

They say that apery is the highest form of flattery. Or in my case, perhaps, flatulence.   But here I am, taking a page out of Kirk Miller and Gary Hallock’s book, and offering a series of limericks (and haikus), which contain clues to the REAL reveal in the end. The clues are there to help you complete the final haiku; which contains the pun.  Unlike Kirk and Gary, I’ve already filled in all of the BLANKS.  Except for one.  The final line of the final haiku; which, as is standard, contains the obligatory 5 syllables.

You’ll figure this out as you go along. I hope!

I’m not going to preface this with more puns, or play-on-words. Those will be left to your imagination, and miner skills needed to extract these “gems”. Hope you have fun solving!

As always, the rogue riddle game ends once someone has achieved “BINGO”, or by Tuesday, June 4, at midnight EDT.  Since there is just one reveal, your answer must be the first to match mine, exactly, to claim the privilege and honor of hosting #975.  But if you’re close, I will hand it off to whoever got closest first … Anyone who responds/guesses will get further hints if totally clueless. To encourage more players, I will REVEAL the answer and WINNER late Tuesday night, or Wednesday morning.

 

Herewith, the riddle:

 

Having skills when she plucks at the strings

Always thrills me; it sounds like she sings

Really softly. Angel-like.

Pedaling, as if on bike.

Spin-class never had one of these things …

 

What amazes me ‘bout this musician,

Every time that she has an audition,

Is the dress that she wears

Really’s shear, and it bares

Derriere.  Judges like her volition.

 

At times, she will play

For a church’s charity.

I think that’s plucky.

 

And in her spare time

She’s reading up on fashion;

To replace worn dress.

 

If you’ve got the clues

The reveal will be easy:

BLANK

 

Please send your guess to my email: 

ca_12_dozen@yahoo.com 



Chris Gross
ca_12_dozen@yahoo.com

Punsters United Nearly Yearly (P.U.N.Y.) Yahoo! Group
Frequently Asked Questions

=====================================================

Written and maintained by Lee Jackson
P.U.N.Y. List Administrangler

Document Created December 13, 2003
Current Revision 1.0 (rev. February 6, 2004)

=====================================================

Table of Contents

I. Group Description

II. Questions About Messages
1. Why was my post returned to me as spam?
2. Why am I getting messages with [spam] in the subject line?

III. Web Addresses and Contact Information

IV. Trademark and Copyright Information / End

=====================================================

I. Group Description

-----------------------------------------------------

(The following is also posted online at http:
//groups.yahoo.com/group/puny/)

Punsters United Nearly Yearly (P.U.N.Y.) is a small, unofficial
group, formed in 1990 to assist the O. Henry Home and Museum in
Austin, TX. Specifically, we help coordinate and present the
museum's largest fundraiser each year, the annual O. Henry Pun-Off
World Championships.

The O. Henry Home and Museum is actually inside the house in which
the famous short story author William Sydney Porter (a.k.a. O.
Henry) lived while in Austin. The house is listed in the National
Register of Historic Places.

The Pun-Off helps to provide operating and renovation funds for the
museum. In the process, we provide free entertainment for over
1,000 spectators each year, collecting funds through raffles, book
sales, and audience donations during the event. The Pun-Off is also
an event that allows the most twisted minds in the country,
P.U.N.Y. members and otherwise, a chance to show just how far the
English language can be bent without breaking.

Discussions shall include and mostly be limited to P.U.N.Y. status
announcements, news on other pun-related events, pun challenges and
discussions, and ideas about future fund raisers and competitions.
Basically, anything pun-related or O. Henry related is fair game.

NOTE: Some messages may contain mildly mature subject matter.
Parental discretion is advised. Please keep things at least at a PG
level if you join. ;-)

Please note that messages posted by new members are moderated at
first. This was made necessary by a number of inconsiderate
spammers. Also, please note that the moderator reserves the right
to reject and/or ban anyone who applies for membership. This is
again for anti-spam purposes, so if you join with a member name
that looks like a spammer address, you might be banned without
notice. If you are a legitimate user and you experience problems
with any of this, please notify the listowner.

=====================================================

II. Questions About Messages

-----------------------------------------------------

1. Why was my post returned to me as spam?

At some point during your stay in the P.U.N.Y. group here on Yahoo!
Groups, you may receive a message in response to one of your posts
that looks something like this:

To: (deleted for privacy - LJ)
Subject: Error [puny] re: (deleted for privacy - LJ)
From: SpamHold <spam.hold@mpcdoc.com>
Date: Fri, 21 Nov 2003 12:07:23 -0600

Your message was filtered by NEMX Spam Filter. Please note that
the intended Recipient did not receive this message.

NOTICE OF CONFIDENTIALITY This communication is intended to be
confidential and solely for the use of the persons or entities
addressed above. If you are not an intended recipient, be
aware that the information contained herein may be protected
from unauthorized use by privilege or law, and any copying,
distribution, disclosure, or other use of this information is
prohibited. If you have received this communication in error,
please contact the sender by return e-mail immediately, and
delete or destroy all copies. Thank you for your cooperation.

Don't panic. This is not your fault.

Why did it happen? I wish I knew. I can tell you what is going
on, though. Someone in our group, be they an active member or just
an observer, has set up a mail program to auto-forward messages
from our group to an address within the mpcdoc.com domain. The
mail server at mpcdoc.com is then marking certain group messages as
spam and then returning error messages. The rest of the group does
not see the error messages, since they are addressed directly to
the original sender.

Unfortunately, it is impossible to trace things once the forwarding
is done, since the SpamHold filter does not include any header
information from the original message.

I have contacted the people at the mpcdoc.com domain, and they are
completely baffled by the situation. They don't know which of
their users is the target of the redirected mail, since SpamHold
apparently deletes the messages before they can look at the
headers.

In other words, there's nothing that can be done to solve the
matter.

In the meantime, if you never want to see one of these messages
again, set up a filter within your mail program. Have it delete
any messages that come from spam.hold@mpcdoc.com, and that'll do
the trick.

-----------------------------------------------------

2. Why am I getting messages with [spam] in the subject line?

Yahoo! Groups has implemented a new feature recently called
SpamGuard. This is an apparent response to a persistent problem
with spam sneaking through into group messages. The following two
links contain information on how SpamGuard works:

http://groups.yahoo.com/local/service-spamguard.html
http://help.yahoo.com/help/us/groups/abuse/abuse-08.html

Here's a quote from Yahoo!'s description of SpamGuard:

"Yahoo! Groups routes messages sent to your group
through SpamGuard. If we detect that a message is
spam, we will notify you and include the message as
an attachment. If you use a Yahoo! Mail email address
for your group, these messages will automatically get
routed to your Bulk folder.

"If you do not use Yahoo! Mail, or if you use POP
access to read your Yahoo! Groups messages in your
email client (e.g., Outlook), you can set up filters
to route these messages to an appropriate folder,
such as 'spam' or 'bulk.'"

There are two problems that I've seen with this so far. The first
problem is that it is a bit overzealous. It marks some very
obviously non-spam messages as spam. The second problem is that it
can break e-mail filters on users' systems. For example, if you
use filters in your e-mail program (Outlook, Pegasus, Eudora, or in
my case, Agent) to route incoming messages into folders, this might
screw things up and result in P.U.N.Y. messages going into your
generic inbox (or worse, trash folder) instead.

There's nothing that can be done about the first problem, but you
can do something to address any filter difficulty you may
encounter. Read the information at this link:

http://help.yahoo.com/help/us/groups/abuse/abuse-10.html

It will show you what you need to get your filter to recognize
SpamGuard-processed messages.

=====================================================

III. Web Addresses and Contact Information

-----------------------------------------------------

To visit the P.U.N.Y. group on the web, go to:

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/puny/

You will be prompted to set up a Yahoo! profile (if you don't
already have one) before the system will let you into the group's
site. There's no charge for this.

Once you're on the group site, you can manage your group
membership (including unsubscription), set delivery options, and do
generally a bunch of other stuff.

To unsubscribe from the group without visiting the site, send a
blank e-mail message (no subject text or body text required) to
this address:

puny-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com

Yahoo! Groups usage terms can be found at:

http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/

The listowner (a.k.a. the Administrangler) can be reached at:

puny-owner AT yahoogroups.com

(NOTE: Spam prevention measures in place - replace the "AT" with
an @ sign and delete the spaces before using the above address.)

Finally, here are some P.U.N.Y. and O.Henry Museum related
websites of interest:

http://www.ci.austin.tx.us/ohenry/default.htm
http://punpunpun.com

=====================================================

IV. Trademark and Copyright Information / End

-----------------------------------------------------

Outlook and the Microsoft logo are trademarks of the Microsoft
corporation.

Agent is a trademark of Forte, Inc.

All other trademarks used or referred to in this FAQ are the
property of their respective owners.


Lee Jackson, P.U.N.Y. List Administrangler
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/puny